You know how they say, “it goes so fast”?

I mean, it’s definitely true. It’s probably because the older we get, the faster time seems to fly (remember when your birthday took an eternity to come back around again?), but still — we just brought Alex home from the hospital, and she has the temerity to turn 18 today.

*Two years old, on our porch in Trinidad.*

*Three years old, laughing at her own joke.*

*About 5 years old, back when we used to do mirror self-portraits on the front porch of our old house.*

As those of you who have been following our family since the very beginning know, Marcus and I chose adoption as our way to grow our family. Adoption is obviously different for each family, and I’ve never given birth, but one thing that I suspect is particular to adoption is that I have absolutely no genetic ego tied up in who Alex is. I mean, obviously, Marcus and I certainly raised her to believe in our family’s values, and there are phrases and particular tics that she’s picked up from each of us (many of them Trinidadian or English, natch), but there are certain characteristics that she has that have nothing to do with Marcus and me, and likely everything to do with nature, as opposed to nurture.

For example, Alex is funny. She has a quick wit that she often wields completely unexpectedly, in the most delightful way. It’s not false modesty to say that she’s way funnier than Marcus and me. (In fact, I remember when she was about two, I was with my friend Mark [who is also Alex’s godfather], and he suddenly turned to me, eyes wide, and said, “Is it weird, or does she seem to really understand what’s funny?” I laughed and responded, “I’m so glad to hear you say that, because I always thought so, but wondered if it was just me being a proud mom. Yes, she definitely ‘gets’ funny, in a way that’s honestly a little alarming.”)

*About 8 years old. Coming into her own.*

Also, she’s really compassionate, with an ability to access empathy in a way that can only be part of who she is, and with an ease that’s truly a marvel. I’ve never seen her pity anyone, but instead easily imagines herself in other folks’ shoes, not because she intellectually understands that that’s what a good person is supposed to do, but just because that’s who she is. As a result, she’s a really patient person with other people, a trait which I definitely do not share. (Her father is very patient, but really, Alex is next level.)

*Twelfth birthday. Getting more difficult to get a photograph without her acting silly.*

*Sixteen* — *she got her driver’s license about 5 days later!*

Alex is also our resident artist — and as we sit waiting for college acceptances, we’re filled with excitement for what lies ahead for her. She’s a big dreamer, which I love: she doesn’t see limits when it comes to imagining her future. No dream is too expansive, and there’s no such thing as a pipe dream, as far as she’s concerned. Whatever she dreams of, she knows she just has to figure out the steps to get there. I love that.

*Seventeen*. *So glad she never outgrew that huge smile.*

Anyway.

Alex is 18 now, and this is likely the very last of the annual photographs I’ll be sharing on her birthday. I can’t believe it’s been 18 years since we brought her home! (And I know some of you have been following along since that very first photo at the top of this post. I can’t express how grateful I am to you for sticking with us all this time, truly. ❤️)

Happy birthday, Diva. Your dad and I are so, so proud of you.